The Merach Portable deep tissue massager caught my eye due to looking vaguely like one of my beloved HTC EVOs and had USB-C charging. The one that arrived looked like my HTC One. It is also marketed as… pocketable. It has the additional distinction of looking like an upgraded version of a portable massager that Costco is currently selling that I’d considered purchasing. Reviewer score!
In the past I was disappointed in the past with a couple of corded options for mostly my wife’s jacked up back, we’d pretty much retired them because while they were OK, power cords and location we generally were (on a couch,) just lead to a fight with cables or choking someone. The one pinpoint rechargeable attack massager I’d purchased had had the power of a weak bunny. I didn’t know these things could be good.
I’m not going to claim this has been used by a professional athlete, it’s been used by me on my wife’s jacked up upper back (her spine and the leaning tower of Pisa bear a resemblance, as more than one doctor and chiropractor have told her throughout her life.) It’s been used on two muscle cramps I’ve had during testing time, although I will point out that one of those in my hand was probably due to using this extensively on my wife’s shoulder blades. I’m not a cramper generally.
It’s like a little jackhammer, and now it’s getting used pretty much every time I sit down and attempt to watch something on TV… “no woman, I’m tired of my hand shaking nonstop!” – I’m pretty sure it also added about 2000 steps to my Withings Scanwatch the other day.
OK, so what can I say about this as I do not generally do massager reviews? It’s extremely powerful, at least in the hands of soft doughy people like myself. Quiet except when whacking into people. The ends are remarkably easy to attach and do not fall off, or at least have not during the couple of weeks I’ve used it. The battery life advertises eight hours on low, I suspect I’ve reached five before I made a testing mistake and plugged it in. I pretty much use low exclusively.
The entire thing feels like one slick piece of aluminum with nothing to catch a hair, fingernail, or anything tiny. Mentioning that I’ll say that the lowest setting is far more powerful than you’d probably consider for the other type of massager. This really isn’t it, and if it is, lord help you.
The attachments that come with the Merach Portable Deep Tissue Massager seem perfectly suited for jacked up back attacking. I’m sure we’re probably using the attachments incorrectly, but they seem to be working pretty decently.
Of course I’ve spent time with the thing and I’m a critic so here’s what I, a doughy IT reviewer, found to note.
Paul finds something to complain about
The charging light exists in that perfect spectrum and illumination of red that I thought it didn’t exist. I’m red/green colorblind however. You may get that I’m stretching to find something wrong with it, you’d be right. I even filmed a video to show the PR firm that sent it to me that it wasn’t there… you know what I could see on the video? It was there. My kids could see it, wife could… eye fail. Maybe use standard blue for USB charging is all I can comment on here.
The Merach Portable Deep Tissue Massager’s grip is functional, but it’s not ergonomic for my hand. It may be for yours, who knows? My wife’s jacked up back requires some pressure be applied, and while this does not slip, it doesn’t fit well with the hand. I believe this is why when I initially was using it I managed to get a hand cramp. I do hold it slightly differently now. I tend to hold it upside down often to relive wrist pressure, and the handle’s a bit too short unless I want to palm the power button.
There exists some vibration level I want to achieve between settings one and two and there’s no way to achieve this. Three speeds. Simple by design. You might like, I found it to be an issue.
No evident way to access contents (2500mAh battery.) Probably not an issue for most. I just wondered if I could turn it into a power bank or fix it if it died because this thing is actually a really really nice hunk of metal. Also no way I see to see battery level. Not a huge woop obviously. It doesn’t run out in normal use. It doesn’t run out in two normal uses. It doesn’t run out in a week and a half of normal uses.
As it might go to the gym or out with me, I kind of wish it shipped with a little nubbin to make it water resistant at the USB C port.
Who’s the Merach Portable Deep Tissue Massager for?
Based on the photos on the advertising, they’re going for a much more athletic audience than us. I will say my wife’s shoulder and neck muscles probably could win in competition against most however.
Actually the target audience is listed as “Office workers and athletes” so uh… yeah, I guess we’re on the office workers side of this.
Speaking of the office, I asked Kim what her comments on this were as the receiving end of most of it for the past two weeks and got the following:
It’s a little more than the beast I was considering at Costco, looks a lot nicer, but in the end does it matter what one of these looks like? That’s a good solid maybe.
I’d make approximately $2.58 if you purchase through the Amazon link above, which would be used to feed the hamsters that power the website. You can click this should you want to not use a tagged link.
Merach Portable Deep Tissue Massager
The Merach Portable Deep Tissue Massager is a lightweight portable deep tissue massager that lasts for several hours per a charge, even on the higher settings. The aluminum housing is very compelling.
Product Brand: Marach
Product Currency: USD
Product Price: 85.99
Product In-Stock: InStock
- Battery life
- 3 "One size fits all" speeds
- Lack of battery indicator